The experience of bereavement following a suicide can be intense and overwhelming. You may experience a wide range of feelings and thoughts which are difficult to understand and to manage.
Here are some activities, which may be helpful:
- Develop a resource list, phone numbers of people and places to contact when the going gets tough.
- Talk to a trusted person who will listen with understanding to your thoughts and feelings
- be with people you are comfortable spending time with in conversation or in silence.
- Eat a healthy diet, frequent small amounts of nutritious, easily digested food
- Light exercise can assist by using up excess adrenaline
- Use physical nurture, massage, spa baths, early nights, and get some fresh air by going for short walks
- Avoid increased use of alcohol, smoking, prescription medication and other drugs.
- Avoid too much coffee and tea to help you sleep at night.
- Collect information, read simple books about surviving suicide, or about grief and trauma, when you are ready
- Spend time alone to think, remember, pray, meditate, mourn.
- Keep treasures, a memory box, journal, photo album
- Create a memory book for family and friends to write stories, memories, messages
- Create or build a special memento for your loved one: a garden, a CD or DVD, photo album
- Prioritise daily tasks, do only what is essential
- Use voicemail to screen phone calls; choose who you will talk to
- Write notes to relatives and friends when you need to tell aspects of your story, or to express feelings
- Find distractions, to provide time out from the pain
- Keep a journal to record your thoughts and feelings, especially if you are unable to sleep
- Spend time with nature
- Review photos and mementoes
- Visit the burial site or some other special place
- Rearrange and store the person’s belongings, when you are ready to do this
- Spiritual searching of self
- Gardening
- prepare for special days and holidays with your family/friends. Christmas, birthdays and anniversaries can be difficult times. Plan a visit to the cemetery, light a candle or maybe spend some time at the person’s favourite place.
- Find ways to honour the life of the person who has died
- make resolutions for new and renewed directions in your life and in the life of your family.
- Individual counselling or a support group