Coping with Grief

The experience of bereavement following a suicide can be intense and overwhelming. There may be a wide range of feelings and thoughts which are difficult to understand and to manage. Here are some activities, which may be helpful.

• Find ways to look after yourself.
• Spend time alone to think, remember, pray, meditate, mourn.
• Talk to a trusted 'other' who will listen with understanding to your thoughts and feelings
• Develop a resource list, phone numbers of people and places to contact when the going gets tough
• Find distractions, to provide time out from the pain
• Collect information, read simple books about surviving suicide, or about life enhancement, when you are ready
• Use physical nurture, massage, spa baths, early nights, and get some fresh air by going for short walks
• Keep treasures, a memory box, journal, photo album
• Create a memory book for family and friends to write stories, memories, messages
• Create or build a special memento for your loved one: a garden, a CD or DVD, photo album
• Eat a healthy diet, frequent small amounts of nutritious, easily digested food
• Exercise to use excess adrenaline
• Prioritise daily tasks, do only what is essential
• Use an answering machine, choose who you will talk to
• Write notes to relatives and friends when you need to tell aspects of your story, or to express feelings
• Keep a journal to record your thoughts and feelings, especially if you are unable to sleep
• Spend time with nature
• Review pictures and mementoes
• Visit the burial site or some other special place
• Rearrange and store the person's belongings
• Individual counselling or a support group
• Spiritual searching of self
• Gardening
• Find ways to honour the life of the person who has died